Here's why you should make yourself a suicide note and carry it with you.

For those of you who saw the title and went like: "Oh my god! I should report this post ASAP!", calm down. It's not what it looks like.

Let me give you a little bit of context. I was sitting in the last bench one day, just about to finish classes for the day. For some reason, the day seemed to be really gloomy. The clouds were grey and black cotton moving slow as ever. It got me thinking about suicide notes.

Why do people even make them when they know where they're going?

Why would people want to leave something behind as a memory of themselves when all they want to do is be gone from the face of Earth?

I came to my own conclusion. Those who left behind notes as such, they wanted only certain parts of their lives left behind to be seen by others. The rest, they took with themselves because they might have felt it wrong leaving it behind.

Isn’t that what we’re all doing, even when we’re living?

We’re fabricating our lives and showing off that part of our lives which would receive the most number of likes, most number of people envying at you? Like the ONE day we happened to get up early and go for a jog, or the ONE time when we control our anger and irritation and instead, proceeded in a peaceful way… you get the point.

Why are we not ready to show the darker parts of ourselves? Like the part of us that chooses to sleep in at 5:00AM six out of seven days, or the part of us that is frustrated and angry 90% of the time and behave poorly with people. Why are we not ready to show our real selves to the world?

I guess it had to do a lot about ego. At least for me, it was. Ego makes us go lengths at some things which we normally wouldn’t think of accomplishing. They might be good things or bad ones. In the end, we’re just playing into our ego’s hands, which we have no control whatsoever over.

So here’s what I came up with:

1. Take a decent-sized paper. Put a big heading on it as ‘suicide note’. What you write below that is important.

2. On the one side, write down all your positives: your accomplishments, your proud moments, your niches etc.

3. On the other side, write down all your negatives: Your weaknesses, your dark habits, habits that you want to change but don’t want others to know about.

4. Make sure not to omit anything and try to stay honest with yourself. Include all/any of your goals or aspirations and how you're working towards (if you are, of course! Not everyone is regular at working towards their objectives.)

5. This note should be folded neatly and kept in your wallet or phone case – a place where it’ll be there with you all the time, anywhere you go.

Use this as a tool to always have a sense of moral and mental direction.

The note would come as a mental reminder saying: ‘If I were to die right this exact moment, I’d have all the people know these things about me. Am I really okay with some of those things on the list being known to people? Should I work towards eliminating the negatives? Am I working towards fulfilling my goals and aspirations?’

When you’re constantly reminded about your flaws (in a healthy way, of course), it lingers around in your mind more often and there is increased chances that you’re going to do something about it. As of the positives, it reminds you about how much you’ve accomplished and how long you’ve come. It helps keep the fire alive.

Closing note

Everyone goes through hard times. Many of them may not show it, but they're fighting their own battles on the inside. Yet, most people want to smile and choose to be happy when given a choice, because that's natural human instinct. Embrace that.

That's it for this blog post, folks. I hope you liked reading this and found it (even just a little bit) insightful. I'll be back with another one. Until then, take care. Cheers!